Here are 10 simple ideas to help overthinkers stop spinning their wheels.
By: Lolly Daskal
Overthinking doesn't sound so bad on the surface--thinking is good, right?
But overthinking can cause problems.
When you overthink, your judgments get cloudy and your stress gets elevated. You spend too much time in the negative. It can become difficult to act.
If this feels like familiar territory to you, here are 10 simple ideas to free yourself from overthinking.
Before you can begin to address or cope with your habit of
overthinking, you need to learn to be aware of it when it's happening.
Any time you find yourself doubting or feeling stressed or anxious, step
back and look at the situation and how you're responding. In that
moment of awareness is the seed of the change you want to make.
In many cases, overthinking is caused by a single emotion: fear. When you focus on all the negative things that might happen, it's easy to become paralyzed. Next time you sense that you starting to spiral in that direction, stop. Visualize all the things that can go right and keep those thoughts present and up front.
Sometimes it's helpful to have a way to distract yourself with happy,
positive, healthy alternatives. Things like mediation, dancing,
exercise, learning an instrument, knitting, drawing, and painting can
distance you from the issues enough to shut down the overanalysis.
It's always easy to make things bigger and more negative than they
need to be. The next time you catch yourself making a mountain out of a
molehill, ask yourself how much it will matter in five years. Or, for
that matter, next month. Just this simple question, changing up the time
frame, can help shut down overthinking.
This is a big one. For all of us who are waiting for perfection, we
can stop waiting right now. Being ambitious is great but aiming for
perfection is unrealistic, impractical, and debilitating. The moment you
start thinking "This needs to be perfect" is the moment you need to
remind yourself, "Waiting for perfect is never as smart as making
progress."
Whether you're afraid because you've failed in the past, or you're
fearful of trying or overgeneralizing some other failure, remember that
just because things did not work out before does not mean that has to be
the outcome every time. Remember, every opportunity is a new beginning,
a place to start again.
Give yourself a boundary. Set a timer for five minutes and give
yourself that time to think, worry, and analyze. Once the timer goes
off, spend 10 minutes with a pen and paper, writing down all the things
that are worrying you, stressing you, or giving you anxiety. Let it rip.
When the 10 minutes is up, throw the paper out and move on--preferably
to something fun.
No one can predict the future; all we have is now. If you spend the
present moment worrying about the future, you are robbing yourself of
your time now. Spending time on the future is simply not productive.
Spend that time instead on things that give you joy.
The fear that grounds overthinking is often based in feeling that you
aren't good enough--not smart enough or hardworking enough or dedicated
enough. Once you've given an effort your best, accept it as such and
know that, while success may depend in part on some things you can't
control, you've done what you could do.
You can't have a regretful thought and a grateful thought at the same
time, so why not spend the time positively? Every morning and every
evening, make a list of what you are grateful for. Get a gratitude buddy
and exchange lists so you have a witness to the good things that are
around you.
Overthinking is something that can happen to anyone. But if you have a great system for dealing with it you can at least ward off some of the negative, anxious, stressful thinking and turn it into something useful, productive, and effective.
But overthinking can cause problems.
When you overthink, your judgments get cloudy and your stress gets elevated. You spend too much time in the negative. It can become difficult to act.
If this feels like familiar territory to you, here are 10 simple ideas to free yourself from overthinking.
1. Awareness is the beginning of change.
Before you can begin to address or cope with your habit of
overthinking, you need to learn to be aware of it when it's happening.
Any time you find yourself doubting or feeling stressed or anxious, step
back and look at the situation and how you're responding. In that
moment of awareness is the seed of the change you want to make.
2. Don't think of what can go wrong, but what can go right.
In many cases, overthinking is caused by a single emotion: fear. When you focus on all the negative things that might happen, it's easy to become paralyzed. Next time you sense that you starting to spiral in that direction, stop. Visualize all the things that can go right and keep those thoughts present and up front.
3. Distract yourself into happiness.
Sometimes it's helpful to have a way to distract yourself with happy,
positive, healthy alternatives. Things like mediation, dancing,
exercise, learning an instrument, knitting, drawing, and painting can
distance you from the issues enough to shut down the overanalysis.
4. Put things into perspective.
It's always easy to make things bigger and more negative than they
need to be. The next time you catch yourself making a mountain out of a
molehill, ask yourself how much it will matter in five years. Or, for
that matter, next month. Just this simple question, changing up the time
frame, can help shut down overthinking.
5. Stop waiting for perfection.
This is a big one. For all of us who are waiting for perfection, we
can stop waiting right now. Being ambitious is great but aiming for
perfection is unrealistic, impractical, and debilitating. The moment you
start thinking "This needs to be perfect" is the moment you need to
remind yourself, "Waiting for perfect is never as smart as making
progress."
6. Change your view of fear.
Whether you're afraid because you've failed in the past, or you're
fearful of trying or overgeneralizing some other failure, remember that
just because things did not work out before does not mean that has to be
the outcome every time. Remember, every opportunity is a new beginning,
a place to start again.
7. Put a timer to work.
Give yourself a boundary. Set a timer for five minutes and give
yourself that time to think, worry, and analyze. Once the timer goes
off, spend 10 minutes with a pen and paper, writing down all the things
that are worrying you, stressing you, or giving you anxiety. Let it rip.
When the 10 minutes is up, throw the paper out and move on--preferably
to something fun.
8. Realize you can't predict the future.
No one can predict the future; all we have is now. If you spend the
present moment worrying about the future, you are robbing yourself of
your time now. Spending time on the future is simply not productive.
Spend that time instead on things that give you joy.
9. Accept your best.
The fear that grounds overthinking is often based in feeling that you
aren't good enough--not smart enough or hardworking enough or dedicated
enough. Once you've given an effort your best, accept it as such and
know that, while success may depend in part on some things you can't
control, you've done what you could do.
10. Be grateful.
You can't have a regretful thought and a grateful thought at the same
time, so why not spend the time positively? Every morning and every
evening, make a list of what you are grateful for. Get a gratitude buddy
and exchange lists so you have a witness to the good things that are
around you.Overthinking is something that can happen to anyone. But if you have a great system for dealing with it you can at least ward off some of the negative, anxious, stressful thinking and turn it into something useful, productive, and effective.
